1. When you tell someone you will be ready in 10 minutes, you still need to shower and wash your hair. Oh and curl it. And pick an outfit. And do your makeup. And eat something.
2. Everyday you stay in bed for an extra 30 minutes even though you know you’ll have to end up running for the bus. You tell yourself every night that tomorrow will be different and the next day you’re running once again.
3. Your friends start lying to about when they will pick you up. They say they will pick you up at 2 when really they are picking you up at 2:30. And oh wait you’re still not ready by 2:35.
4. You try to be offended by your friends telling you to meet them at 6 for food instead of 6:30 but then you arrive at 6:45 and you’re like okay point taken.
5. You underestimate how much time you’ll actually need to get ready. Because sure you can stay in bed a little bit longer. And sure you can watch more episode on Netflix. But then you have 10 minutes until he will be here and you’re in a towel with your makeup only half done.
6. But if you do actually arrive on time or are ready to be picked up, your friends almost have a heart attack. They are so used to having to just walk in your front door because they know you won’t be dressed to answer it. That when you’re stood there curled hair and all they almost have a seizure.
7. Still when you are late, you don’t bother trying to come up with an excuse anymore. You just say I’ll be 30 minutes late don’t be mad xxx. And hope they don’t completely cut you out for being a bloody nuisance.
8. It always seems that on the day you’re actually ready on time or leave early, you forget something important. You actually got up to go to the library to do work but you leave your memory stick at home. You forget your lunch. You leave your water bottle in the fridge. So you have to end up going back or regretting the full day. It makes you wonder if it’s just easier being late for everything.
9. For the most part the reasons why you’re late is because your room is a mess and you can’t find anything. Or you need to wash your hair. Or you wasted so much time instead of actually getting ready. Or someone called you and totally distracted you with some dramatic story.
10. And if it wasn’t one of those reasons then it was definitely that you were just watching Netflix until the very last second. Casually trying to fit a 45 minute episode in to the 20 minutes you had spare.
11. But even if you had an amazing reason why you were late. Like I don’t know. Something crazy. No one would even care because they would just think you were making it up due to the hundreds of other times you did exactly that in the past.
12. If you were born way past your due date (15 days for me) then people will always joke about how you’ve never been early for anything in your entire life. HAHA. Definitely not funny I just hate my natural hair and feel the need to curl it.
13. But at the end of the day you don’t consider yourself late, you consider yourself time-optimistic.
14. You’ve tried everything to just be on time. You even tried making all your clocks and watch 5 minutes fast. But it still doesn’t bloody help. You just think oh perfect I have 5 minutes longer than that, I definitely have time for winged eyeliner.
15. However you’ve got totally good at being persuasive enough that people aren’t mad at you when you are late. Or totally good at picking your friends who are either also late or think of it as an adventure when you are. And also totally good at finding friends who will help your curl your hair and pick your outfit just to make you a little less late than you both are at this point.
16. You’ve missed a lot of things like assembly at school and form tutor meetings but you also really don’t care. You spent those 20 minutes having a Taylor Swift sing along in the car with your fellow chronically late best friend. What else would you want on a Monday morning?
17. When you have something you absolutely need to be on time for, like work or catching a flight, you try and give yourself 2 hours extra time. Like if you get up at 8 and are ready to leave by 10:30 at the latest then you have ages and you won’t be late at all. But then you end up getting up at 10. Oh and leaving the house at 10:45.
18. Your life basically falls apart for two days whenever it’s daylight savings.
19. Your whole family is used to shouting your name whilst you’re running round looking for that other earring. You make your entire family late to every family gathering that has ever taken place.
20. You’re going to be late to wherever you need to be now because you got distracted and suddenly found yourself reading this instead of actually leaving your house.
21. Or in my case, I’m writing this instead of actually getting ready for sixth form. Shit. Gotta run. AGAIN.